I Let You Down

I saw you yesterday for the time in years. You were everything I remembered , good and bad. You glowed in the day as if everything else was dark. You spoke with the passion of 20 lifetimes. Everything  was right in the world. I was next to you, and you were next to me.

I know you are probably at some point going to see this. I am trying to be as honest as I can be. I still love you. I still care about you. And I still dream about you.

You deserve to have someone better than what you've had. Someone that can give you the world. I want to be that person, but i just don't think you will see that. I am sorry I let you down. I will do my best to be better and support you any way I can. To guide you through the mud. To show you the stars that are behind the dirt and clouds. To hold you when you are scared. I may have let you down before, but I want to make it up to you now. We have so much more to do in this life. Let's fight until there is nothing left of us.

I've had a while to think about this. I don't think you care about me. I don't think you'll wonder how I am doing like I wonder for you. That's okay though because I don't want to force anything. All I ever wanted was for you text me first and ask me how I am doing. That's all I wanted. You didn't, and wouldn't ever. So thank you for everything. I just can't keep crying over you. Because no matter what I'll always want to hold you forever, and that's impossible. I'm done feeling sorry for myself. I would have changed your life, I would have been the one that made you feel like the prettiest girl in any room. I wish you the best of luck. I did everything I could to help you see the light. I'm all out of tears for you.

Eventually, I bet that we
Could have made this work
And probably woulda figured things out
But I guess that I'm a letdown
But it's cool, I checked out
Oh, you wanna be friends now?
Okay, let's put my fake face on and pretend now
Sit around and talk about the good times
That didn't even happen
I mean, why are you laughing?
Must have missed that joke
Let me see if I can find a reaction
No, but at least you're happy